Monday, June 23, 2014

Confessions of a one time conex princess

Can anyone comprehend the difficulty of honesty? Explaining oneself in a way that absolves not only guilt but responsibility of past actions is at best very hard to do. Especially when those actions happened in past tense atmosphere. Fortunately for myself the story that I am about to tell is funny (at least to me).

I met my previous boyfriend a mere four months after a breakup with a longstanding boyfriend. The summer of that breakup I term (affectionately) my slut phase. If it was of the opposite sex, walked upright and had (at the very least) their front teeth, I was game. Now, up till this point in my life I had dated within my realm of people. Nerds to put it bluntly (and, I would like to add, before it was popular). I didn't have to reach far to find someone within my bubble and was content to pick solely from this lot. After the breakup I decided I had spent too long in one attitude (and color). I realized I had  never dated (made out, slept with) anyone who wasn't a) a chef or cook or bartender and, b) white. The fates surely heard my plea for almost overnight my place of employment had become a construction zone complete with construction workers. 

Imagine if you will sweet, little (not really little) ole Megann, bookworm and closet romantic amongst all those construction workers. It was heaven. These were men with capital M's. Not that the nice young men I had dated previously weren't but there is just something about a guy that works with his hands. They fixed things without instructions and knew the names to tools I had never heard of. They built things. It was (still is) hot. I was drywall mud in their capable hands ready to be spread (oh man, that was a good line).

I had set my sights on a young one (though the older were more susceptible to my charms) and with practiced charm and actually shaving for once we became friends. It didn't take long for late night conversations to include late night confidences, never have I ever's and then (finally) fooling around. Nothing too scandalous, I think it was more the danger of getting caught that was the best (still have super fond memories of conex trailers).  He left to go to another job (that's the way construction goes) and I took up with another one of the guys who I am actually quite good friends with till this day.

Fast forward three (OMG three) years. My boyfriend is working on his house in which i currently live. We have been through it all remolding wise and are done with this stupid project and cannot believe we started it in the first place. We need help. We have called and gotten quotes, hired and fired guys. I remember, somewhat belatedly, that I have this certain friend who works with his hands for a living (sigh) and maybe he could come out and look at the house. My boyfriend understandably is not too keen on this idea. I call him anyway and ask if he knows anyone who could help with this project. He sends me the number of a friend of his that he trusts to do the job I have described. Super excited I dial the number and realize it is already in my phone. My mind goes back three years to a hot and dark conex and my heart sinks even as I start to laugh. My boyfriends refusal of help from one of my former lovers has landed us straight into the lap of another! I call the guy anyway, wondering if he has (hopefully) forgotten about me cause I really would like a stove installed in my kitchen. He didn't answer and I don't know if he will call back.

So back again to honesty. I can tell him whats up and let him decide if he wants this guy to work for us. "Hey babe, a funny thing happened to me today...." Or I can let it hang hoping it won't blow up in my face in a disastrous way. "Hey man, your girlfriends butt is rounder than I remember it being, does it still...." Either way wish me luck!